There are two things most of us have in our lives - a mobile phone and varying degrees of stress. And the one universal worry with phones is the amount of time we spend on them, which just adds another notch or two to those already worrying stress levels.
Of course one of the problems with phones today is that they are so much more than just phones. They are a diary, an alarm clock, an address book and a camera, with an endless supply of apps allowing us to do everything from practice mindfulness to manage bank accounts. They are a shop window to every kind of retailer imaginable, they are our travel agent, ticket office and sat nav, and could easily keep us engaged around the clock with the hypnotic effects of social media, games, endless streaming options, and an infinite library of music and podcasts.
It’s no great surprise then that we’re checking our phones hundreds of times a day. It’s also possible to see why a strict no phone policy after 8pm would be a challenge for many, and for some, simply unachievable from the outset.
So instead of a rigid ban that might just send those stress levels shooting up like a rocket, here are five tips by Elaine Robertson North on how to stay connected without leaping into action with every intrusive alert, and the benefits that could be enjoyed as a result.
Be Selective
With phones fulfilling such a wide range of roles, let’s be selective about how we use them post 8pm. No gaming or streaming, no checking emails and certainly nothing relating to work. No watching limitless videos on TikTok and ditch the constant scrolling through social media.
Retrain Your Responses
If the phone rings, then answer it. It is a phone after all and for many, it has replaced the traditional landline. But any other sound can easily be ignored. Over time, we’ve become like Pavlov’s dogs, reacting without hesitation to every beep, ping and whistle. The assumption is your phone will always be within grabbing distance, so we’ve allowed ourselves to believe we’re expected to respond immediately, but it’s simply not necessary. If it’s urgent, trust that the phone will actually ring.
Reclaim Your Evenings
Providing so much entertainment and taking up so much of our time generally, an evening can easily be dominated by our phone. So once the habit of checking it every few minutes has been broken, why not indulge in a journey of rediscovery? A leisurely dinner with a face-to-face conversation. Reading an actual book. Watching a television programme at the time a scheduler deemed it most appropriate to do so, and on a screen large enough to be able to enjoy every detail. What a joy to remember so many activities we used to enjoy before we allowed our lives to be swallowed almost entirely into one small electronic device.
Set An Example
Children and phones can be a terrifying combination and the dependency of a generation, born into a time when having a phone is almost a rite of passage, is literally mind-blowing. So let’s set a solid example. Let’s show that every pause in the evening doesn’t have to be filled with a quick game or a scroll through Instagram reels, that not every message requires an urgent response, and that there are interesting things to experience in every direction if you just put down the phone and lift your eyes.
Be Brave and Switch It Off!
If you can comfortably minimise your usage, how liberating would it be to give yourself permission to completely switch off? The key thing to remember is that just because we’re accessible twenty-four seven, doesn’t mean we have to be available!
